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Marrying Relatives

May 4th, 2007

I have came across some incidents where some people have married people who are not actually eligible for marriage according to the accepted view of that religion or sect.

In my religion it is OK for a girl to marry her mother’s brother but it is WRONG to marry father’s brother. In some Religions it is other way around. In some places both are WRONG and in other places both are OK.

Every one with enough biology knowledge can tell that both of them are WRONG according the nature of reproduction and Genes. The close the Genes are the more the chance to get diseases like cancer and many more. That is why our tradition evolved in such a way that you can not marry your family member. I hope every one accepts till here.

But the point of this article is to introduce another much impotent point to consider.

Assume that there is a relation between two people called Z. Now according to the local culture marriage it is not ethical between people with Z relation. Assume that there is no bold relation (no common genes) between people with that relation.

Now will you support marriage between people with Z relation or not?. All old people will say “NO”. And the new young people who know about genes and all will say “YES”. So lets assume that you said ‘YES”.

For a marriage between any persons there must be an initiation from some party. Lets call the pair X,Y. So it means either X or Y should think of marriage. Thinking about marriage is not a simple task. It involves lot of other factors in it. First there must be an interest for either one on the other one. That interest almost all the times involves thinking about sex, sexual thoughts, beauty or some thing similar.

So either X or Y have that feelings before the other person is become aware of it.

According to the Hindu culture when a relation do not permit marriage between a relation, It is unethical for any one to have such feelings on the other person with that relation.

For any structured society it is most important that two people should be well ware of the expectations of the other person for them to communicate, live together. But in above situation only one is having an exceptional expectation from the other person. Remember I am talking about only one side expectation because even for similar expectation from both sides it must start in one side only(unless u express it u will not know that other side is also expecting same).

Assuming that X is unaware of Y’s exceptional expectations, X’s behavior will be totally different from Y’s behavior. And such situation is very dangerous for the safety of the people and culture.

We are humans, not animals. Only we have the capacity to do things which are not pre determined through genes. Our acts are the tools of evolution. The evolution that is needed is cultural. We need to decide if we want to be just animals or some thing more great.

The society in which such situations (above said dangerous situation) are common is going on the wrong direction. I don’t want us to go in that direction. By saying Hindu society I do not mean anything that it past, or anything or orthodox views. I only mean the great human culture we wanted to develop.

Now it is your turn to think and decide which way you want to do.

There is nothing we are going to loose by opposing such marriages. We have enough people the world to find an another mate. It is not about interests of individuals anymore. It is the about way the culture is moving. If there are any one who still supports such marriages based on the fact that there is no common genes I have a simple question, “Will you support the marriage between brother and sister provided that you know that they are decided not to have any children ever?”. If your answer is ‘YES” please let me know who you are.

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